coping mechanisms

A range of coping mechanisms anyone can call upon – 

• Get enough rest and sleep.
• Make time for yourself every day to be alone and quiet.
• Make sure you get outside to refresh your connection to nature.
• Maintain an active life—don’t be chained to the situation.
Share duties and responsibilities. Ask for help before you feel overwhelmed.
• Pursue a regular routine—this helps offset unpredictable events.
• Find an activity that makes you feel in control.
Find a confidant with whom you can share your feelings without judgment.Don’t martyr yourself by taking on more than you can handle.
• Fight the urge to feel victimized.
Don’t isolate yourself—keep up your social activity.
• Seek out people in the same situation who can empathize with you and offer positive support.
Resist self-judgment. Be easy on yourself, accepting the ups and downs of emotions as natural.
Where there is the possibility of finding joy, pause to appreciate it.

The Healing Self: A Revolutionary New Plan to Supercharge Your Immunity and Stay Well for Life
Deepak Chopra and Rudolph E. Tanzi

life situations can serve as signals to alert us to an imminent transition…..

Each of us lives in a world, and that world is meant to dry up in its time like a withering flower to make way for the growth that follows it. Lacking an understanding of the process, we are depressed and discouraged when it happens. We say that things aren’t going well for us. We look for ways to solve our problems, fix things, and get our lives back on track again. Of course, “back on track” means “back on the track they were on before we encountered this difficulty.” And that means “back into the life that it was actually time to let go of.”

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We cannot always place responsibility outside of ourselves, on parents, nations, the world, society, race, religion….

Image result for taking responsibility

We receive a fatal imprint in childhood, at the time of our greatest plasticity, of our passive impressionism, of our helplessness before suggestion. In no period has the role of the parents loomed as immense, because we have recognized the determinism, but at the same time an exaggeration in the size of the Enormous Parent does not need to be permanent and irretrievable. Continue reading

Parable of Change – The Road to Davy’s Bar

Image result for The Wicklow MountainsThe Wicklow Mountains lie just outside Dublin, Ireland. It is an area of wild beauty, a place to which, as an Irishman born there, I return as often as I can. It is still a bare and lonely spot, with unmarked roads, and I still get lost. Once I stopped and asked the way. “Sure, it’s easy,” a local replied, “just keep going the way you are, straight ahead, and after a while you will cross a small bridge with Davy’s Bar on the far side. You can’t miss it!” “Yes, I’ve got that,” I said. “Straight on to Davy’s Bar.”  “That’s right. Well, half a mile before you get there, turn to your right up the hill.” Continue reading

The Idiot

Image result for the idiotIn a village there was a fool. He was very upset because no matter what he said people laughed at him. People had decided he was a blithering idiot. Even when he said something right people still laughed at him.

He lived cowering, not daring even to speak. If he didn’t speak people laughed, if he spoke people laughed. If he did something people laughed, if he didn’t do anything people laughed. A monk came to the village.

That night the fool fell at the monk’s feet and said, “Give me some blessing. is my whole life to be spent shrinking and cowering like this? Will I die a blithering idiot? Is there no way I can become a little intelligent?” Continue reading