Nurturing Relationships
(Contributed by Rehana)
“What we leave behind is not what is engraved on stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others.”
Pericles
“Our death is not an end if we live on in our children and the younger generation. For they are us.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
In our present society, the competition is for victimhood. It’s almost hilarious how people want to rush onstage to tell you how they’re the victim. And they’re almost in competition to see who’s the most wronged. Who’s the most wronged gender or race or color? Who’s a victim of money, social position, politics? Everybody’s out there in the competition to see who has been the most wronged. It’s like a moral competition. Who’s the most wronged here? Is it the old people or the young people? The Republicans or the Democrats? Who’s getting the biggest part of the wrong? It’s almost comical when you see it. Everybody just loves to rush on television and say how they’ve been wronged. That’s narcissism—to milk everything for all you can get out of it. And then when you finally see it for what it’s worth, and you see it through the viewpoint of the self-feeding of narcissism, you only feel sorry that people got stuck in it. It’s one thing to, as a passing phase, milk a crisis for all it’s worth, but then there’s a time to get over it. What you want to do is help people get over it and move on in life.
David Hawkins
Using data from the Harvard study, two researchers showed in 2001 that we can control seven big investment decisions pretty directly: smoking, drinking, body weight, exercise, emotional resilience, education, and relationships. Here’s what you can do about each of them today to make sure your accounts are as full as possible when you reach your later years:
′′….. Stop having hard conversations with people who don’t want change.
Stop showing up for people who have no interest in your presence. I know your instinct is to do everything to earn the appreciation of those around you, but it’s a boost that steals your time, energy, mental and physical health.
When you begin to fight for a life with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to follow you in this place. This doesn’t mean you need to change what you are, it means you should let go of the people who aren’t ready to accompany you.
If you are excluded, insulted, forgotten or ignored by the people you give your time to, you don’t do yourself a favor by continuing to offer your energy and your life. The truth is that you are not for everyone and not everyone is for you.
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