life situations can serve as signals to alert us to an imminent transition…..

Each of us lives in a world, and that world is meant to dry up in its time like a withering flower to make way for the growth that follows it. Lacking an understanding of the process, we are depressed and discouraged when it happens. We say that things aren’t going well for us. We look for ways to solve our problems, fix things, and get our lives back on track again. Of course, “back on track” means “back on the track they were on before we encountered this difficulty.” And that means “back into the life that it was actually time to let go of.”

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What is it time for me to let go of ?

Whatever its details, an outer loss is best understood as a surrogate for some inner relinquishment that must be made, but one that is difficult to describe. What it is time to let go of is not so much the relationship or the job itself, but rather the hopes, fears, dreams and beliefs that we have attached to them. If you let go only of the job or the relationship, you’ll just find another one and attach the same .hopes, fears, dreams and beliefs to it. And, on the other hand, you may find that you can let go of those inner attitudes without actually terminating the outer situation. Continue reading

We resist transition not because we can’t accept the change, but because we can’t let go of that piece of ourselves that we have to give up

Transition, is the process of letting go of the way things used to be and then taking hold of the way they subsequently become. In between the letting go and the taking hold again, there is a chaotic but potentially creative “neutral zone” when things aren’t the old way, but aren’t really a new way yet either. This three-phase process-ending, neutral zone, beginning again-is transition. Transition is the way that we all come to terms with change. Continue reading